I feel like writing this. Mabye it isn’t good for me. But right now I don’t care of what I should and shouldn’t do. I finally feel that I am almost at the end of the road. After blood and tears. After all the hurtful things I have gone through. All the shit I have dealed with, inside and out.
I know, I hate reading this stuff on others blogs. That they have no time left for their little “blogbubble”, because that is what it really is. . It’s time to be real. Go out, and embrace the reality and life. I feel like this is the end. The end of the anorexic chapter in my life. I am me again. Finally. I want to embrace it, for better and for worse. I am finally ready. Ready to spread my wings and take of. To go to unlimited hights.
Actually it’s sad. I’m sad to leave you all alone. I will miss you. All of your positive comments and support. Right now I’m actually sitting here crying. Crying by myself. Thinking of how my life will be. How much I have grown. And how strong and independent I have become.
I know I will regret this, leaving you all behind. But later I will thank myself, letting completely go of my anorexia. And Iwill let you guys know that you probably will see me in the US next year. Because there is where I’m heading. To the states. To the land of the free. And that has been my ultimate motivation. To follow my dream. And that has been one of my biggest dreams. To go to the US as an exchange student. And now I feel that I am ready. It’s time.
It’s time for me to go. Take care everybody.I will carry you inside my heart, as clichè as it sounds.
I’m finally worthy. Worthy of happiness, life and love. Just to live life. And be myself.